Gin & Titonic Ice Tray

Now the nice weather is here, anyone with a yard larger than an A4 envelope ought to be eating breakfast, lunch and dinner outdoors. If it’s larger than two A4 envelopes, then friends and family should also be involved, and that means plenty of cold drinks. In the past, choices involving ice have been limited to a) yes or no, and b) how many cubes. At Mantality, however, we believe that interesting ice is a basic human right. Just use any of the following ice trays and no guest will ever endure boring cubes again.

FROZEN SMILES

These are ice dentures which can be used to gross out squeamish guests, or seriously confuse elderly relatives. The latter will end up with cold mouths and a surfeit of teeth, while the former won’t be able to drink from a glass that looks as if it should be sitting on a bedside table.

HAVE AN ICE DAY

The phrase “crying into your drink” need never be heard again with this product. Every time you take a giant gulp to forget that your girlfriend left on the anniversary of the death of your favourite pet, you’ll be staring into a glassful of smiley faces. Just try staying depressed after that.

GIN & TITONIC

April next year marks the centenary of the Titanic disaster, so what better way to commemorate one of mankind’s greatest follies than novelty ice? Pour a large measure of your favourite drink and add one of the doomed ocean liners. Next, put on some Celine Dion, drop in an iceberg, and let nature take its cold-blooded course.

CHILL PILL

What can we say about the Chill Pill? Well, firstly, the jokes about spiking drinks will grow old in minutes. Secondly, if you ignore the marketing, they’re basically large cubes with rounded edges. Finally, and this is the good bit, if you overdose on peri peri then the Chill Pill is exactly the right shape and temperature for administering direct relief the next day.

ICE SHOT GLASS

Imagine a nightmare scenario in which you have a pressing need to get spectacularly drunk, but there’s only warm beer in the cupboard. Normally you’d have to wait at least twenty minutes for the fridge to work its magic, but not anymore. Simply fill an Ice Shot Glass with vodka and drop it into the beer glass. Within a minute you’ve got cold beer and a ruthless alcohol delivery system, often referred to as a Depth Charge. What’s more, there’s no danger of choking because they’ve been specifically designed to melt in the throat before the first onset of brain damage. Maybe.

© By Jack744 for Mantality.co.za

© By Jack744 for Mantality.co.za

Anyone who owns a battery-powered gadget will have suffered the agony of a flashing power meter at some time or another; usually just when said gadget is needed. The Achilles heel of such feature-rich devices is their reliance on mains power, and that is where the Powertraveller range steps into the spotlight. Solar technology and efficient batteries (guaranteed to hold 75% of their charge for at least a year) are headline qualities that make these the best portable chargers on the market. The clever people at Powertraveller have created four variants, each with its own pros and cons. Read on to see which one is right for you.

The entry-level model is the Solarmonkey, a clamshell solar panel that plugs directly into a mobile phone, iPod or PSP. It can also charge the packaged Solarnut, a tiny battery that gives approximately 15 minutes’ talk time if the sun doesn’t turn up. Together they weigh next to nothing and are perfect for topping up your device while at the beach. Unfortunately, they aren’t powerful enough to charge power-hungry smartphones such as the iPhone4 or HTC. As they only work using sunlight, they’re also pretty useless on a winter holiday in England.

Should you happen to live somewhere that sees less sunshine than the dark side of the moon, don’t fret though. The Powermonkey Explorer takes all the good aspects of its cheaper brother, improves on them, and then throws mains or USB charging into the mix. A fully charged Explorer can run an iPod for 40 hours or provide up to 96 hours’ standby on any smartphone. With interchangeable tips, it’s possible to leave all your untidy chargers at home, and thus the Explorer is ideal for trips where you are near a mains socket each night. Simply charge your devices on an ad hoc basis during the day, and plug it in while you sleep. The only downside to this lightweight wonder? It doesn’t pack enough punch to cope with the iPad or other tablets. For that, you’ll be needing the Powermonkey Extreme.

Weighing in at 0.5 kg including the clamshell, the Extreme may be heavier than the Explorer, but not a single gram is wasted. The capacitor unit holds a massive 9000mAh worth of charge which, to put it into language we all understand, is the equivalent of almost two full charges for the iPad. A handy Velcro strap can attach the solar panel to a tent or rucksack, making the Extreme the go-to charger for outdoor pursuits and camping trips. It’s also waterproof and shockproof, so a sudden downpour or careless companion won’t stop you playing Angry Birds in the Serengeti.

Finally, for hardcore outdoorsmen there is the Powergorilla. Working in tandem with the Solargorilla, this variable-voltage monster can recharge practically anything, up to and including laptops. The two Gorillas weigh over 3kg combined and, unlike King Kong, are probably tough enough to survive a fall from the Empire State building. Best not to try, though!

If you’re still undecided, Mantality would recommend the Extreme every day of the week and twice on Sundays. The massive charge it can hold, coupled with the built-in female USB port, make it a consummate all-rounder that fits into a case the size of a beer can. You’ll never have to suffer a dead battery again.

© By Jack744 for Mantality.co.za

In recent years, the month of November has seen the world’s men sprouting moustaches at an alarming rate, only to shave them off and pretend nothing happened as soon as December rolls around. Is it temporary insanity, or a sure sign that more and more of the planet’s males are developing a penchant for musical theatre?

In fact, it’s neither of these. It’s Movember; a global charity drive where volunteers agree to stop shaving for an entire month in return for sponsorship. It’s the best kind of fundraising for most guys because it actually requires less effort on their part. Although it’s now technically too late to get involved if you aren’t already, there’s always next year. In the meantime, here are just a few facts and figures about Movember:

• Since its conception, over 1.1 million ‘Mo Bros’ have raised more than R1.2bn for men’s cancer charities.
• Participants must be clean shaven on Movember 1^st and may only groom the resulting ‘tache.
• According to the ‘rules’, the moustache must never touch any sideburns. Failure to comply results in disqualification as a beard-wearing muppet.
• A ‘Mo Sista’ is a woman who supports her ‘Mo Bro’ by spreading the word, finding sponsors and generally ignoring the fact her man looks like a Village People reject.
• Celebrities who are famous for their moustaches include Merv Hughes, Hulk Hogan, Ron Jeremy and Tyra Banks.
• Gala Partés are held worldwide to celebrate the end of Movember. Participants meet up to show off their moustaches, award prizes and get totally hammered.

Movember is for an excellent cause, but the downside is that you’ll eventually have to shave off a month’s worth of upper lip hair. You could use a disposable razor, of course, if pain is something you actually enjoy. Alternatively, why not treat yourself to a little bit of luxury with this Mühle Dark Horn set and some Nickel Fire Insurance balm. Your skin will thank you!

There’s also a nifty Movember app for your iPhone®

AR Drone for iPhone Air Battle Modes

© By Jack744 for Mantality.co.za

Every once in a while, someone takes an old idea and reinvents the hell out of it. Apple did it with the iPhone, and now Parrot has come up with the AR Drone Quadricopter. Remote control aircraft used to be associated with pale nerds spending months lovingly building a Sopwith Camel, before crashing it first time out. Not anymore! The AR Drone in itself is an awesome flying machine, as you can see here, but Parrot didn’t stop there. The fact that control is via compatible smartphone or tablet, using the AR Drone’s built-in cameras and augmented reality, allowed the software developers to be very creative. The resulting game modes are the icing on the cake, not least because you can pretend you’re in any one of these classic films:

TOP GUN

Action-packed and ridiculously homoerotic (unintentionally, we hope, although it was backed by the Navy), Top Gun gave so much joy to a generation of adolescent males. For the straight petrolheads, there were fighter jets going ballistic. For the gays, there was the volleyball game. With ‘Flying Ace’, you can recreate the thrill of the former. You and a friend control a Drone each, using the controller’s display to out-manoeuvre and ‘destroy’ the other with computer-generated missiles. Shouting “Yeehah, Jester’s dead!” is optional.

RETURN OF THE JEDI

Anyone who watched the Speeder Bike chase and didn’t think “I have got to get me one of those” was either female or dead. Unfortunately, technology hasn’t yet stretched to high velocity hover bikes, but the AR Drone’s Pursuit app is the next best thing. Just find the nearest forest and take it in turns to mercilessly hunt each other’s AR Drone amongst the trees. For a true homage to Han Solo et al, you could get any younger siblings to dress up as Ewoks and throw rocks about.

THE TERMINATOR

Remember those haunting images of Skynet’s airborne Hunter Killers scouring the desolate landscape for surviving humans? Well, now you can play the part of either soulless robot or mankind’s last hope. It won’t be entirely faithful to the original because there’ll be fewer mountains of crushed skulls - unless you live in a really bad area, that is! However, the man versus machine element is definitely still there. The Drone pilot uses the aircraft’s cameras to search for the other player, who wears a specially designed baseball cap. Meanwhile, the ground-based player uses his smartphone to target the AR Drone with, of all things, a slingshot. First one to deplete the opposition’s health bar wins.

These are only three of the game modes available for this incredible gadget. There’s loads of fun to be had pushing the aircraft to the limit. And if that limit is exceeded, Parrot is more than happy to sell you spare parts!

Another SA exclusive to Mantality.co.za! Get your freak on this Halloween. The makers of the world’s best selling male sex toy: Fleshlight have created a line of freak themed Fleshlights which are sure to make your skin crawl. The Fleshlight Freaks come in the following models and retail for R990 (incl vat, ex delivery)

• Zombie Fleshlight
• Alien Fleshlight
• Frankenstein Fleshlight
• Dracula Fleshlight
• Cyborg Fleshlight

© By Jack744 for Mantality.co.za

A record number of today’s women are prime minister or president of their country; leading from the front, rather than from behind an unfaithful husband. However, just because it’s a record doesn’t mean it’s a lot. Worldwide, the count is hovering around twenty, although this may fall if rumours about Thailand’s PM turn out to be true. Given the male/female population is split 50:50, there is a slight favouritism towards men. Why are so few women world leaders? Based on the following characteristics, which many have in abundance, they really ought to be running the entire show!

PAIN THRESHOLD

Women like to pour scorn over men claiming to be in pain, using childbirth as a baseline below which no fuss should ever be made. The analogy of ‘shitting a melon’ crops up time and again. This is definitely stretching it a little, but still a fair point. Soldiers, who regularly put themselves in harm’s way, would agree that trying to pass anything larger than an orange is going to end in tears. Imagine what could be achieved with an army of individuals who consider disembowelment a mere inconvenience…

TEARS APLENTY

Why then, when women can withstand pain that would destroy mortal men, do they start crying at the drop of a hat? Basically, it’s for one of two possible reasons. Either they are incredibly sensitive, or they want their own way. In any argument, it’s a stone-hearted guy who can go in for the kill once the waterworks are switched on, whether they’re genuine or not. When British PM, Margret Thatcher, was kicked out of office, she shed enough dignified tears that her opponents felt sorry for her. And she was a tyrant!

SCHEMING

“The best laid plans of mice and men,” poet Robert Burns once wrote, “often go awry.” Note how he was happy to lump us in with rodents, but didn’t mention women. The female mind has an innate ability to picture how it wants the future…then it sets about making it that way. One minute your best mate’s girl is arranging for you to meet her plain friend, the next you’re standing at an altar, wondering what just happened. Solving the Middle East problem should be a piece of piss for these powers, although they do seem to have difficulty with simpler puzzles like the M-Cube.

SEXUAL DEALING

The main difference between prostitutes and the rest of womankind is that the former take cash. Throughout history, sex has been one of the few bargaining chips that women possess, and men want. Why not use it? However, these days the withholding of ‘favours’ isn’t simply a good way to get that new BMW. If you Google “sex strike”, it’s clear that it is becoming quite a fashionable weapon in the Battle of the Sexes. Not that there is likely to be a global strike any day soon but, just in case, you might want to stock up on these!

One of the coolest flying gadgets on the planet just got better! Previously the Parrot AR.Drone iPhone controlled Quadricopter was only available to fly (using the iphone FreeFlight App) with iphones, ipod touches and ipads. Now the makers of this insanely addictive flying device have released an Android App as well, so just about anybody that owns a tablet or smartphone worth its salt (IMHO Blackberry is a little on the skids as of late) can now fly one of these.

To use the FreeFlight application, your Android phone or tablet must meet the following criteria:
Your device must be running Android version 2.2 (or a later version). To check what version of Android is installed on your phone, go to Settings > About phone > Software information > Android version.

• The screen of your device must have the Multitouch function. Please refer to the user guide or specifications for your phone for more information.
• Your device must have an accelerometer. Please refer to the user guide or specifications for your phone for more information.

Get your Parrot AR.Drone today or find out more and how to download FreeFlight for Android here.

How many articles do you think there are that advise men on how best to attract the fairer sex? And how many of those recommend the total sanitisation of your place, removing anything that may offend a delicate nature? Shit, if we’re honest, there are quite a few of them on this blog! But where are the articles for the man who has no intention of receiving female visitors? The man who, when it comes to the game of love, only plays away from home? Not all males succumbed to the feminist backlash that blighted the Noughties, and many still refuse to let any cushion through their front door unless it’s of the ‘Whoopee’ variety. For these stalwarts, here’s a list of products guaranteed to turn any pad into a chick repellent:

BOOBIES SHOWER GEL DISPENSER

This bathroom accessory is impossible to own if you’re in a relationship, because you’d have to endure, “Oh, for God’s sake, how old are you?” on a daily basis. Most women are also insecure enough to compare it to their own breasts - something that will rarely end well. For the single guy, however, every shower with these puppies is riddled with guilt-free schoolboy fun.

CAT’S ARSE SHARPENER

If your idea of the perfect pet is an ungrateful, hissing, sadistic fur ball, then you might want to stop reading now… and count your testicles. The only cat that should ever be seen in a true bachelor pad is this one. Just take a blunt writing implement and, for want of a better phrase, shove it up its bum. There’s a satisfying “meow!” as the mechanism does its job - a fitting revenge for all those times Tiddles has lashed out with razor-sharp claws. Even if you don’t use pencils or crayons, get some. Then get this! (this product is available in a dog version too. This is, of course, sick and cruel.)

LIKE/DISLIKE RUBBER STAMPS

Can you imagine how much fun there is to be had with these simple stamps? You can show one and all your opinion on bills, foreheads, TV listings, cellulite, clothes, breasts…

Now imagine how popular they’d be in a cohabiting scenario…

DRAUGHT BEER PUMP

There are plenty of men in relationships who have bought one of these. However, it’s a certainty that it sits in an unobtrusive corner of the kitchen while their lounge is so girlie it reeks of oestrogen. As a bona fide singleton this needn’t be the case, as you have full responsibility for your own Feng Shui. Don’t worry about getting the books out, though, because we’ve already looked it up. As far as we can tell, maximum Ch’i is achieved when the beer pump is TV-facing and right next to your favourite armchair.

© By Jack744 for Mantality.co.za

Unless you are an unfortunate who happens to be allergic to alcohol, the chances are you’ve drunk to excess at some point. We all have stories to tell, often involving phrases like “…then I woke up in an alley”, “…no idea where my keys were”, and “…turns out she had a cock”. Therefore, with your well-being in mind, Mantality supplies the following gadgets to ensure you make it home with all your bones intact. Unfortunately, at the time of writing, we still can’t find one that determines whether your date is carrying a little extra downstairs!

FIREFLY NIGHTSTICK

No more stumbling down unlit streets or across treacherous fields in the pitch dark. The chemical reaction in this product gives approximately 8 hours of light, meaning you can pretend you’re at an ’80s acid party all night and still find your way home afterwards.

ECCO II GPS LOCATOR

So small it doubles as a key fob, this impressive gizmo is essential for nights out in unfamiliar territory. Simply save the coordinates of your intended bed for the night and the ECCO II will show you the way to go home at the press of a button. Obviously, there are levels of drunkenness above which even simple button-pressing is an impossible task. That’s why it would be prudent to invest in the next item as a backup.

TAGZ SCROLLING MESSAGE LED BADGE

Whilst this was originally designed as a novel way of sending messages across crowded nightclubs, the fact that the text is user-programmable allows you to turn it into an electronic ‘Return To Sender’ label. Just type in ‘If found, return to…’ followed by your address, and let the basic goodness of humanity do the rest. For those embittered cynics out there who choose to believe that people are more likely to take your keys and clean out your home while you sleep, it might be better to use the phone number of a responsible adult.

TRUE UTILITY LOCKLIGHT

There’s nothing worse than making it all the way home, only to be defeated by the front door. So, rather than sleep on the doorstep until either daybreak or the police arrive, Locklight fits any standard key and illuminates the keyhole when squeezed. Whether you pick the right one from the three that are in front of your blurred vision is a different matter, but at least you can see them!

DIGITAL ALCOHOL BREATHALYSER

Apologies for ending on a serious note, but people who drive at a snail’s pace on the wrong side of the road aren’t the only ones who fall foul of the law. The human body needs time to process alcohol and no amount of black coffee or egg whites can speed it up. After a heavy night, it’s possible to have residual alcohol in the bloodstream until well into the next morning. A quick blow into this breathalyser takes all the guesswork away, letting you drive with confidence.

© By Jack744 for Mantality.co.za

When Apple first revealed their plans for the iPad, the world wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. Somewhere in between laptop and smartphone, most gadget aficionados dismissed it as a gimmick that would join tablet PCs in the bin. They were dead right about there being no market for such a device, but they forgot to factor in Steve Jobs’ ability to create unlimited demand out of nothing. Competitors rushed to bring out their own versions but, in this pissing contest, the iPad has by far the biggest bladder. Is it possible to improve on perfection, though? Mantality thinks that it is, and here are four ways to do it:

JOBI GORILLAMOBILE ORI (R799)

(Pictured above) The problem with something as stylish and desirable as the iPad is that everyone wants one. Apple provides an innovative folding cover in just enough colours to give a hint of individuality, but they also give the impression that your precious tablet has a garden fence stuck to it. If you want to stand out from the crowd, you could do a lot worse than the Jobi GorillaMobile Ori. Designed specifically for the iPad2, this design marvel is made of super-strong aluminium, weighs bugger all and, when it’s not lovingly protecting the screen, it transforms into a cool stand - perfect for FaceTime or watching movies.

FROSTFIRE MOONTUBE (R499)

OK, you got us! The iPad isn’t actually perfect in every way because the built-in speakers are, let’s face it, a bit crap. Given their size, they do as well as can be expected but can give a sound similar to that experience on a bus when the person next to you is wearing headphones. The Frostfire Moontube is a powerful, portable speaker that produces superb sound and half-decent bass to boot. It’s also a standalone MP3 player that comes with an attachment that clips to a bike, so you can still play your tunes whilst hurtling down a mountain. With your iPad safely stowed, if you come off at high speed only your bones get shattered.

POWERMONKEY EXTREME (R1,550)

The iPad’s battery is more than enough to last a normal day, but what if you’re going somewhere for an extended period of time where there’s no power? Lagos, for example. This lightweight charger has enough juice to recharge the device twice over and a solar panel tops it up in between. It’s rugged enough to be shockproof and waterproof so is perfect for outdoor pursuits. Be careful though: should your activities put the powergorilla through everything it’s built to withstand, you probably won’t have an iPad left to charge!

TOUCH SCREEN STYLUS (R99)

The iPad is at the cutting edge of modern technology, so this stylus is a great way to mix old school with new. Looking like a chunky HB pencil, complete with eraser on the end, it works with capacitive screens like Apple’s Retina display. If you wear gloves for any reason - cold weather, surgery, ahem…crime* - you’ll be able to use the iPad without taking them off.

*Mantality is in no way advocating the use of this stylus to commit crimes. Chances are you‘d still leave DNA everywhere anyhow!