Here’s a fantastic article by John Alexander (of the “How to Become an Alpha Male” ebook fame) on the essence of your body language, what is it communicating and how to use it to your advantage.
An estimated 67% to 93% of human communication (according to university researchers) is non-verbal, and your body language reveals your internal emotional state.
So, as a man who tries to pick up and seduce women, you should be mindful of what you’re communicating non-verbally.
Body language consists of the following:
– Your movements. They should be nonchalant, as if you’re so fabulously successful that there’s rarely a reason for you to rush nor try to impress anybody. Move through the world doing what you want and assuming that others will follow.
– The displacement of your body. Your arms and legs should be spread out. Don’t be afraid to take up space.
– Your voice. It should have a calm, soothing, and commanding effect. Don’t speak too fast or strain your voice.
– Your face. Keep your facial muscles relaxed. Never tense your jaw, and only rarely should you frown or wrinkle your brow.
– Your shoulders. Keep them relaxed like they’d be if you just got a massage. Don’t raise them up like a nervous person.
I would even go as far as to say that you body language is more important than anything you say, because if your body language doesn’t match what you say, then you won’t succeed with women.
You see, if you tell a woman stories that convey your confidence, but at the same time you slump over and fold your arms, then you come across as fake.
I’ve picked up women before merely through the use of my body language. For example, a couple months ago I was at a coffee shop that I frequent, lounging on the couch, arms spread out, with my feet up on the table.
The mindset I had was that I felt so comfortable that it was as if I were in my home lounging on my own couch. It was as if I owned the coffee shop.
The net result was that a girl sitting near me put down her book and started engaging me in random small talk.
(Whenever an attractive girl you don’t know starts a random conversation with you, you should ALWAYS assume that she’s attracted to you. This is because women generally won’t risk the whole male-female dynamic, especially with a stranger, unless they feel attraction.)
The conversation went on for awhile, I got her number, called her that night, and a few days later we met and after several hours went to her place, where I spent the night. (We finally had sex in the morning.)
The bottom line though is that she became initially attracted to me and approached me because of my body language.
Now, of course body language isn’t enough. You also must have an internal alpha male mindset that’s consistent with your body language.
But make no mistake about it… if your body language conveys confidence, then your mood will also shift to become more confident. And have you ever noticed how when you walk with a spring in your step, you feel more upbeat?
Conversely, when you cast your eyes down and drag your feet, you feel depressed. So your mindset also follows the body language that you adopt.
So, in conclusion, be an alpha male with your mindset and your body language. Be in a woman’s personal space and be sexual and interested in her, but at the same time don’t be needy or desperate for her attention. Just be comfortable and enjoy yourself.
And when your body language conveys that, it means you’ll later be comfortable and enjoying yourself… with the woman.